Two Daddies, Two Mommies

The first time I experienced a gay couple was in primary school, when my one friend’s two dad’s came to pick her up from school. At the time it didn’t really confuse me, I actually thought it was pretty cool. But later I started to think about the daddy and mommy dynamics and how that would potentially effect the child’s upbringing.

Two men holding hands

“LGBT-headed families are not a new phenomenon.” (Raise a Child, 2015). LGBT is the initialism used to refer to lesbians, gays, bi-sexual’s and transgender-ed. There has been a 15% increase in the support of same-sex marriages from 2009 to 2014. There has been a lot of  “disagreement among sociologists as to what the consequences of raising a child in a single-sex family [are], whether that is harmful to the child or not.” (Slate; 2015). 71 studies were done that found that the parenting of same-sex parents compared to that of opposite sex parents didn’t effect the upbringing of the child, expect for 4 cases which had other external factors involved such as “gross limitations”.

There are many false perceptions revolved around gay and lesbian parenting. Many people have questioned how it would effect the sexual orientation of the adopted child, and researchers have reported no difference than those raised by heterosexual parents. American Academy of Pediatrics explain that the child’s development has nothing to do with the sexual orientation of the parent but rather on factors such as “parental stress, economic and social stability, community resources, discrimination, and children’s exposure to toxic stressors at home or in their communities” (American Academy of Pediatrics; 2013).

In fact Live Science, Abbie Goldberg (psychologist at Clark University in Massachusetts) claims that in many ways Gay parenting can be more so beneficial than that of heterosexual parenting, they “tend to be more motivated, more committed than heterosexual parents on average, because they chose to be parents” (livescience; 2012). About 50% of heterosexual pregnancy’s are unplanned and even though many parents will argue that you cant really prepare for becoming a parent, not wanting a child at a specific time or perhaps not ever expecting to be a parent at all, can play a big role.

Live Science also talks about how research indicates that children that are parented by Gay’s or lesbians tend to be more “open-mindedness, tolerance and role models for equitable relationships” (livescience; 2012). An examination done on children bought up by Lesbians also reviled that these children were more confident than heterosexual children, this was because of the effective and joint involvement in the child’s life.

These kids have a huge sense of empathy and an impartial outlook on gender, sexuality and what it means to be a family. Ultimately all a child really needs is a loving environment, it’s as simple as that and the rest will follow.

J. Doe states, “Some people say that having two dads is wrong, I’m just happy to have someone that loves me, what’s so wrong with that?”


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